This thanksgiving is a bit different for me this year,
besides it being my first American thanksgiving; it is also the first time that
at first I struggled to be thankful. Now that quickly changed when I stopped
and thought about it. But I woke up this morning with a hurt in my heart and a
tear in my eye. At first I didn’t quite understand why I was feeling that way
on a day committed to giving thanks to our great King, and when I know daily
that I am blessed beyond belief but alas that pain was still throbbing in my
chest. Missing a dear friend, missing home, wishing for something different.
But things began to change when I ran into my roommate and
she saw my tear stained face and like a good sister, she took me and held me
for a while and just prayed over me. Reminding me that is it ok to cry, it is
ok to feel pain, because that pain is real and the Lord has blessed me with
emotions. And without even knowing it she allowed me to realize how blessed I
am, and by giving me permission to not be perfectly put together she reminded
me what I have to be thankful for. My support system around me. These 8 months
have been tough, and on some days that uphill struggle didn’t seem worth it.
But without fail whenever I needed a friend, a hug, a reminder from home, it
was there. The Lord has blessed me beyond words with the most incredible and
supportive family of my dreams, as well as amazing best friends at home to pray
for me and support me no matter where in the world I am. He is faithful to
provide friends around me to become my family in the place I am. I have been
surrounded by family and friends here that have loved me so well, and have been
the hug when I needed it most. They have been the words of truth when the lies
were becoming fuzzy and starting to sink into my life. They have been the laugh
and adventure that I needed when a week full of studying was starting to
overtake my brain. They have been the shoulder to cry on when all I knew was
starting to fall apart. And most importantly they have been the reminder to
turn to my best friend, my Savior in every situation and aspect of my life.
So to my friends here, whether you were here only short or
have been through it all, I thank you. For being the friend I needed exactly
when I needed it. For speaking the truth I needed to hear. For partnering with
me in prayer. And for making me laugh and providing some of the greatest
memories and experiences of my life.
To my friends at home, thank you for supporting me in prayer
and financially to be here. For seeing my vision and allowing me to go and
chase after it. For loving me from afar and being the great rock I needed in
the constant change of YWAM.
To my family, you inspire me. You love me even at my worst
times. And honestly your prayers have gotten me through so much and help
transform me into who I am. Your love is felt everyday, and I am so blessed to
call you my family, my supporters and my best friends.
And to my Papa in heaven, you are my King, my Rock, my best
friend, my everything. The way you love me amazes me. I am so unworthy but you
take me and make me into a greater person than I could ever be alone. You have
been with me through everything and you have enabled me. Thank you Jesus, for
all the blessings you have provided me with. For the places you have taken me,
and for the plans you still have that are far beyond my imagination. I owe you
all. I stand in awe of your majesty, I don’t have much, but I give everything.
I love you papa.
Happy Thanksgiving all.
Much love.
